Catholic Universe Bulletin

Favorites

To bury the dead
Turning troubles into dreams
Caring for those in the dumps
Coming out of the dark
Sharing the gift of life

Sharing the gift of life
Longtime friends truly know the meaning of ‘God puts people in your life for a reason’

MARIBETH JOERIGHT
St. Mary Parish members Kathleen Kist and Marianne Doman share a bond of faith, friendship and health.

By Jerri Donohue
HUDSON-“God puts people in your life for reasons you may never know. But sometimes you get the neon light,” Kathleen Kist said. “And that would be Mare.”

Kist, a type 1 diabetic, received a kidney from her friend, Marianne “Mare” Doman on February 24 during a 7‑hour operation at the Cleveland Clinic.
The two met in Orlando, Florida in 1984. At the time, their friendship filled an immediate need by alleviating homesickness and loneliness while their husbands worked long hours for the same restaurant chain. Doman, who grew up in Lyndhurt, and Kist, a native of Pittsburgh, often shared meals, excursions and poolside confidences.
“Never did I think that she would one day give me life,” Kist said of her long‑ time friend.
Eventually Joe Doman and Dave Kist accepted positions with other companies. Although the couples relocated, they stayed in touch. The Domans settled in Hudson. They urged the Kists to do the same when they moved to northeastern Ohio in 1993.
Today Doman and Kist, both 49, volunteer in a variety of ministries at St. Mary Parish, Hudson. Their paths often cross at parish functions. Aware that Kist suffered from diabetes since early childhood, Doman, a dietician, noted the progression of the disease.
“She was already watching her protein intake and giving herself extra insulin when we had lunch together,” Doman said.
In November 2007, doctors told Kist to find a kidney donor or resign herself to dialysis. Since Kist’s sister was not a match for her relatively rare blood type (B negative), the Hudson resident joined the national waiting list for kidney and pancreas transplants.
Doman had witnessed the value of organ donation within her birth family and within St. Mary Parish. During a severe case of flu in 1991, her father suffered acute renal failure. He later received a kidney from Doman’s sister.
Doman remembered the example set at St. Mary, too. When Walter Smith died suddenly, his widow directed that Smith’s liver be donated to fellow parishioner Jack Rigby who desperately needed a transplant.
With these two precedents, Doman, who has Type O‑positive blood, promptly tested as a potential kidney donor for Kist.
Ensuing blood work identified her as an acceptable match.
“It was as close as if I was a sister,” Doman said. “What would be the chances? ”
Doman’s husband and four children—three college students and a high schooler‑‑ supported her decision.
“As much as this was a gift from me, it was from my family, too,” Doman said.
According to a study released by the University of Minnesota early this year, kidney donors live just as long and remain as healthy as people with two kidneys, But, should she herself ever need a kidney transplant, Doman would go to the top of the waiting list. And, to ensure her health as a donor, Kist’s insurance company paid for a battery of medical tests. It also covered all expenses incurred by the transplant.
As the donor, Doman initiated scheduling the surgery. She reported to Cleveland Clinic for pre‑op procedures just two days after fulfilling responsibilities for St. Mary’s Mardi Gras. She even hosted an Oscar party two nights before the transplant.
“She’s a maniac, this woman!” Kist laughed.
Both donor and recipient said they felt spiritually prepared for the surgery by February 24. They had already received the Anointing of the Sick. At St. Mary, St. Joan of Arc Parish and Ohio State University, priests offered Masses for the operation’s success. Friends, relatives, current and former priests from St. Mary’s, and parishioners wintering in Florida participated in around‑the‑clock prayer chains that day.
“I had no fear,” Doman said. “I couldn’t think anything bad would happen after all that.”
Kist, too, had resolved her worries.
“I felt total peace that no matter how it would end up, God would take care of it,” she said. “No matter what outcome, I would be okay. My family would be okay.”
All surgery carries risk, however.
“My biggest fear was for Mare,” Kist admitted. She wanted her friend to emerge from the operation “as vibrant and giving as she went into it.”
Both women recognized the apprehension their spouses felt.
“We were joking, keeping it light for our husbands,” Doman said. “As much as I went through, my husband suffered mentally that first day,” she added.
Upon awakening after the operation, each woman requested a report on the other’s condition. Once reassured, each settled into a rapid recovery. As an organ donor, Doman spent 48 hours on the Clinic’s VIP floor before being released. Kist went home after four days in the hospital, a day sooner than most transplant patients.
Well‑wishers flooded them with cards and flowers and parishioners delivered meals three days a week, a kindness both women found especially helpful. They also treasure gifts received prior to the surgery‑‑prayer shawls and prayer quilts and crosses blessed by the Pope.
A week and a half after the operation, Doman, a self‑employed consultant dietician, resumed working, at first with 6‑hour days. Within weeks she returned to a whirlwind of work and parish activities.
Kist, meanwhile, attributed her increased vigor to receiving a kidney from this energetic friend.
“People say there’s no connection, but I’m living it,” she said.
Like Doman, Kist now enjoys walking for exercise.
“I’m sleeping like she sleeps, on minimal hours,” Kist said. “I’m eating fruits and vegetables. I crave them. I can’t get enough of them. I have this need to eat healthier.”
“That’s from you!” she said to Doman.
The friends hope their experience will prompt others to consider organ donation.
Kist, who still waits for a pancreas transplant, said that tens of thousands of Americans need organ donations.
“If only one person would be inspired to donate, I’d be thrilled,” she said. “It is life‑giving.”
Doman said that the transplant enabled her to impact Kist’s life.
“Faith, family, friends,” that’s what life is all about, Doman said.
Donohue is a freelance writer.